You are sitting around at home on a calm Saturday. It was a relaxing morning until you heard a loud alarm coming from your phone. You glanced at the screen and saw a nationwide emergency news alert: a dangerous virus has spread that causes people to turn into the undead. These infected individuals have only one purpose in life- to spread the zombie virus to everyone on Earth. The zombies quickly spread across the country and have completely taken over your hometown of Holland, Michigan. People are in a complete panic, but you know exactly what to do, because an article you read in the West Ottawan newspaper has all the best places to go during this apocalypse.
The first thing to know is what characteristics you are looking for in an apocalypse hideout. You’ll need a location that is either low profile to go unnoticed by zombies or is fortified enough to repel them. You will also need a reliable way to obtain everything necessary.
West Ottawa High School has many upsides as a refuge from the zombies. Each campus area has a unique aspect that makes it useful. The cafeteria will have an extensive supply of food, and thanks to the amount of preservatives in typical school food, much of it can stay edible for a long time.
Several elective classes also contain unexpected tools that many people wouldn’t think of being in a school. The culinary class will have some food, but also lots of cooking appliances and utensils. The fashion design class is stocked with fabrics and tools needed for fixing clothes. The shop classes will have the materials and hardware needed to reinforce anything, and you can build all sorts of new shelters and tools to fend off the undead. To stay healthy and pass the time, you can exercise in the school’s gyms and explore the thousands of books stored in the libraries.
Despite its numerous advantages, West Ottawa has some downsides that prevent it from being the ideal sanctuary. The school has dozens of entrances that could make for a quick escape, but they will leave you completely vulnerable to zombie break-ins. The resources in the school would be spread out between the North and South buildings, leaving you quite exposed when travelling between the two for required resources. The main issue with living at West Ottawa is that you’re in a school, a place most people dread going back to.
Many people would think of going to the highest ground possible, but Holland doesn’t have any truly tall buildings. You could try to climb up a cell tower, but if the zombies have any climbing skills, you’ll be in a big pickle with no way to get down.
One of Holland’s features is the beaches, giving direct access to Lake Michigan. You may try to make a home out of the Big Red lighthouse; it is quite isolated from other structures and has a pretty low profile compared to a lot of the giant beachfront houses. Unfortunately, it is such a famous landmark of the city that many other survivors will think of it, becoming competition for your hideout. Alternatively, you can take a boat out away from shore. Even if the Zombies are fair swimmers, you would be too far out for them to reach. The Lake would have an endless supply of water (Although you should probably distill it before drinking), along with plenty of fish to catch for sustenance. The problem is that you will need to dock your ship to refuel and get new supplies, meaning a return to zombie-infested harbors.
There are hundreds of businesses in Holland that could double as zombie-proof hideouts, but Menards tops the list out of them all. The store is beloved by the community, attracting numerous frequent shoppers who know all the ins and outs. One such shopper, West Ottawa teacher Kevin Klassen, as id, had this to say: “Menards is great because they have almost anything you could want or need. Need stuff for the lawn? Menards. Need tortilla chips? Menards. Need food for the birds? Menards.”
It has many characteristics that you would be looking for in a long-term shelter. Its giant open floor plan can accommodate a small survivor community. The extensive collection of building materials will allow you to barricade the store effectively and build all kinds of structures you would need. Their well‑stocked food aisle means you won’t run out of provisions, while the greenhouse department provides seeds and gardening tools for sustainable food production. Other hardware stores may also serve as good shelters, but Menards’ sheer size and extensive wares make it superior. Overall, Menards has the best qualities for both short-term survival and long-term settlement.
While this article may seem like it’s discussing extreme hypotheticals, the threat of anarchy breaking loose is very real, zombies or not. The information presented here might just come in handy one day; you never know.
