Dad Jokes

Halle Pratt

This year has been rough, and we’re all in need of a little laugh. I decided to ask high school students their favorite dad jokes. Here are the results: 


Elle O’Connor: “I had a dream that I was eating a huge marshmallow, and when I woke up my pillow was gone.”


Kaitlyn Meyer: “What do you get when you throw a book into the ocean? A title wave.”


Kate Roudebush: “I asked my dog what two minus two is. He said nothing.”


Ethan Kelch: “What do you call a cow in an earthquake? A milkshake.”


Tyler Berkman: “Why do dads always bring an extra pair of socks when they go golfing? In case they get a hole in one.”


Jake Smutz: 

Kid: “I’ll call you later dad!”

Dad: “Don’t call me later, call me dad.”


Eoin Ingersoll: “Sunday is always a pretty sad day. But the day before that is always a sadder day.”


Anjanique Kladder-Garlock: “My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home”


Sydney Willard: “I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey… then I turned myself around.”


Levi Henning: “What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.”


Bella Kephart: “What’s brown and sticky? A stick.”


Kam Dumas: “What is Darth Vader’s mom’s name? Elevator… cause she raised him.”


Megan Blake: “What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.”


Aric Gamez: “What does a house wear? Address.”


Caleb Louks: “What happens when you slap Dwayne Johnson in the butt? You hit Rock bottom.”


Nash Bosma: “How does a penguin build his house? Igloos it together.”


Trent Mulder: “Have you ever eaten a clock before?” “No.”  “Ok.” 


Damian Rosales: “What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop”


Alex Spilotro: “This guy is getting ready for prom. He goes to the tuxedo rental place and he waits in the line for 3 hours. Then, he goes to the limo rental place and he waits in another line for another 3 hours. Finally, he goes to the florist to get flowers for his date and it takes another hour. Then he picks up his date and they go to the dance and his date says ‘Will you go get me some punch from the punch bowl?’ And after all of that waiting there was no punch line.”


Claire Vellinga: “What did the cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear.” 


Payton Puente: “Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it!”


Jessie Servis: “What does a fish say when it hits a wall? Dam.”

Alex Toth: “What does a computer call his father? Data.”


Jaky Orellana: “What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.”


Melanie Hernandez: “Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.” 


Sam Nagelvoort: “Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.” 


Mirayma Mireles: “What do you call it when a group of apes starts a company? Monkey business.”


Itzel Trevino: “I have a fear of speed bumps, but I’m slowly getting over it.”


Andrew Ky: “I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, then it hit me.”


Ella Scheffler: “Is that a white board? It’s remarkable.”


Jeanne Hecquet: “What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know but the flag is a big plus.”