It was the first week of 2nd grade and during the summer, all the elementary schools upgraded their playgrounds with brand new equipment. Usually, the hotspot on the playground was the slide. After lunch, everyone races towards the jungle gym to be the first one to go down. All of us were filled with excitement because the new playground was amazing and nothing like the old one. The colors were so bright. I wanted to explode with excitement.

There was one problem…. The only way to go down the slide was to climb up a ladder.

As everyone was waiting to climb up the ladder I had numerous questions: Will I be able to climb up there? Can I take my time and hope others will be patient? My turn was next; the panic set in, and as I put my right foot on the first step… I couldn’t pull myself up. For me, climbing a ladder felt like climbing Mt. Everest.

“Hurry up!” said a kid waiting behind me. “We don’t have all day! Recess is only 25 minutes!” said another. “Come on! How hard can climbing a ladder be?” remarked a third.

Thankfully, my grandma took me to the playground multiple times after school to practice climbing the ladder, and I did get better at it. I still wonder what recess might have looked like for me if I hadn’t learned to climb that ladder – or if my disability was even a tiny bit worse.

About Me and My Cerebral Palsy

My name is Tori Guerrin, and I have a disability called Hemiplegic Cerebral Palsy (CP). Hemiplegia is a type of CP that causes paralysis on one side of the body and is caused by an injury to the spinal cord or brain, often before or during birth. The common signs of this disability include muscle stiffness, poor muscle control, and weakness.

Growing up with a disability was very challenging. My parents had numerous concerns and were worried about what my future might look like. My Dad, Seth Guerrin said: “When you were first diagnosed with CP, I was concerned about your ability just to do everyday tasks.” But after seeing how far I’ve come, his and my mom’s concerns shifted to my abilities interacting socially and being as prepared and independent as I can be for my adult life.

As for my siblings, I used to feel as if I was holding them back or worried that they were embarrassed by my disability or frustrated with all the little things they had to help me with.

My older sister, Kira Guerrin said: “I would never say that your disability ‘got in the way’ during any point in my life. However, I will say that I would be a completely different person if I didn’t have you as my sister growing up. As of today, I just need to make sure you screwed the peanut butter lid correctly, so it doesn’t go bad! Either way, your disability has set me ahead regarding empathy, and it has given me an unwavering amount of patience.”                                                                                                                      

Challenges as a High School Student at WO

Cerebral Palsy seemed to make a lot of things feel impossible when I was little.  Today, as a Junior at West Ottawa, I don’t have to worry about playground equipment anymore… but there are still things that can feel impossible.

One example of a difficult situation for me at WOHS is participating in the Black Hole student section. In a recent Instagram post for the August 29 football game, the Black Hole leaders were listing some rules: “Seniors in the front, freshman in the back,” “Be loud and proud!” but one rule that stood out to me was “Dress to the theme, or go sit with your mom.”

As a student with CP on one side of my body, it’s extremely difficult for me to stand on the bleachers and keep my balance in the student section while everyone else is jumping around and shaking.  For me, the only choice I have when it comes to attending school football games is to actually “sit with my mom.”

Another example of a simple, yet difficult task includes choir concerts. Before every performance starts, the choir that is singing must get in their correct lines on the risers. Everyone is usually bunched up together and no one has enough space between them. My gross motor issues make it hard to balance. Walking in tight spaces is difficult and I worry that I’m going to fall. What’s even harder is that my classmates don’t think to reach out an arm or a hand for support, so I can safely get to the other side of the risers without worry.

Powering Through My Struggles By Doing What I Love

Due to my desire to be involved in activities at West Ottawa, I’ve learned to advocate for myself when I need help. Numerous staff members have helped me tremendously by coming up with beneficial accommodations that allow me to fully participate in activities I enjoy.

In 8th grade, I auditioned for the middle school musical Guys And Dolls Jr. and played General Cartwright. After three months of rehearsals and putting on an amazing performance for our audience, I decided that musical theater was an activity that I wanted to add to my life – because of the love that I found in it. I have participated in every WOHS Theater production since, whether it was as an usher, props crew, or running the soundboard and sound effects. This year I got cast in West Ottawa Theater’s upcoming musical: “The Music Man” (Nov: 1,2,8,9-7:30, Nov 3-2:30)

Even though I am getting to participate in Theater and do something I love, a part of me used to worry that my disability would prevent me from being successful in Theater.

            Director Joe Huber said: “Well, my first concern was mainly with your health and whether the movement required of you would in any way harm you.  I don’t want someone to be injured, disappointed, or embarrassed because of something I’ve asked them to do. The other concern is your emotional well-being. 

I want to ensure you are comfortable with the movement I ask of you.  I have always said, ‘I will never let you look bad or awkward on stage.’  So, I always want to ensure that the movement suits you and that you are happy with it and not embarrassed.”

This is just one example of how West Ottawa staff members have supported me and accommodated my needs regarding my disability. West Ottawa staff and administration must understand the positive impact that is felt when students of every ability can participate in as many aspects of student life as possible. 

There are still challenges that I struggle with and often find difficult to overcome, but when I advocate for myself and ask for help – they get a little easier.  With preparedness, respect, integrity, dependability, and effort, I will not let Cerebral Palsy define me and my ability to do incredible things. GO WO!