Love, your way
November 29, 2022
Hi, my name is Mark Cosgrove and my love language is physical touch. I particularly value bear hugs, pats on the back, and hi fives. This is what makes me feel the most loved. The 5 love languages quiz helped me to identify this quality.
The idea behind the Love Language quiz is quite simple. As human beings with distinct personalities, each individual has their own ways of expressing and receiving love. While not perfect, the love language quiz can give a good idea of how one best gives and receives love. Learning your loved ones and your own preferences can help to minimize conflict, grow deeper bonds, and truly help to grow closer. Whether it is with your friends, family, or romantic partners, the love language test can help your relationships to grow and flourish.
Physical touch – People whose love language is physical touch crave exactly that, being touched by others. Touch can be in the form of a high five, hug, fist bump, pat on the back, or simply having your arm touched during a conversation. Touches can communicate love, warmth, affection, and safety to those whose language is touch.
Quality time – People whose love language is quality time crave full undivided attention. No distractions. Dropping everything and giving this person your full attention is what truly makes them feel special. Distractions and failure to listen can be hurtful to this person.
Words of affirmation – Words mean everything to these people. Hearing the words I love you can be everything. Unexpected compliments and kind words can make their day. A handwritten letter can build them up like crazy. Insults and harsh words will leave them feeling down and are not forgotten easily.
Acts of service – These people feel valued when they receive help with tasks. It can be as simple as helping them with homework, helping them with chores, or even getting off the couch to get the remote. Any act that will help to ease this person’s burdens will help them to feel valued. Giving this person more work and breaking commitments will make them feel unloved.
Gifts – Often mistaken for materialism, people whose love language is gifts thrive on the thoughtfulness, love, and effort that goes into a gift. The perfect gesture or gift can truly show this person that they are loved, valued, and cared for.
In a way, this love language quiz is similar to a personality test, such as the enneagram test. To learn more about the enneagram personality test, go read Kira Guerrin’s article on the West Ottawan “You are just a number”. https://thewestottawan.com/11609/student-life/you-are-just-a-number/
This quiz is extremely helpful in further understanding yourself as well as how you give and receive love from others.
Robert Cosgrove’s results were 30% Physical Touch, 27% Quality Time, 20% Words of Affirmation, and 17% Acts of Service, 7% Receiving Gifts. So according to the quiz, the best way to comfort Robert would be a big hug. Robert believes that these results are accurate, “ I think so – however, I know that I really enjoy getting a small unexpected gift from time to time”. Robert believes that this quiz helped him to understand himself better. “Helps me understand why Julia (mom) and I connect so well. I think we have similar love languages so we fit together like a puzzle”. Although this assumption ended up being wrong, Robert and his wife’s love languages are similar. This is just one more reason to have both partners take the quiz. Robert believes that this quiz can help you to better understand how to love others in your life. “I think it helps challenge me to be aware of how I am showing love to my spouse and aim to match how they best receive love.” Robert believes that this similarity in love languages that he has to his wife is one of the reasons that they get along so well. Knowing that helps them to connect further. “You always hear people say that opposites attract and work best together, but my wife and I have found the opposite. We are super similar in our interests, our personalities, our faith, and in our love languages. I think that those similarities make it easy to be best friends and show love for each other. It’s the best.”
Julia Cosgrove’s Results were 30% acts of service, 27% quality time, 23% words of affirmation, 20% physical touch, and 0% gifts. All of her percentages are very close together. In this way, she is sort of a special case. Julia explains that although she was surprised at first, acts of service being her number one makes perfect sense. “I was surprised at first but when I think of how I give love to others, that makes sense. I show my love for others by serving them. Like doing little things they find helpful. Making sure they are comfortable and have everything they need. So I guess it makes sense that I enjoy being loved in that way too.” This is exactly why it’s so important that each and every person takes this love language quiz. It can help one to learn things about oneself that one doesn’t realize at first. Now that Julia knows what her love language is, she applies it to her life and realizes that quality time is and always has been one of the main ways that her husband loves and cares for her. “ It actually helps me appreciate my husband because he naturally does so much for me and our family. So his love for me feels secure. It’s a constant in my life.” A real life example of Julia feeling love through quality time is when Robert planned our family’s spring break vacation. “ This past summer, he took time to research, find and book an AirB&B in the UP for our family vacation. That felt overwhelming to me and he was busy too but the fact that he took time to do that made me feel loved.” Julia is a firm believer that knowing your love language can be essential to communication and love itself. “ I think when someone communicates with you based on your love language it makes you feel known and being known is a big part of love.”
Jr. Noah Carithers got physical touch as his number 1. Carithers believes that this is completely accurate to his character. “I love it when my friends greet me with a hug or give me a high five during a game or something along those lines.” Carithers bottom love language came out to be acts of service. Noah is extremely independent and rarely asks others to do things for him. Carithers’s girlfriend’s love language is also physical touch. He believes that showing affection the same way helps them to connect better. Carithers believes that taking this test helps him to understand himself better. “This does help me understand myself better because I know how I acknowledge love.”
Sr. Kira Guerrin believes that she does not have one specific love language, but is a little part of all of them. Quality time did come up to be her number one, but all of the percentages were very similar. After thinking about this herself, Guerrin really couldn’t decide which love language was more important to her. “Though quality time ended up coming out on top, the love languages that fell below were all very close in their rank. I have never been able to decide which love language is the most important to me or the most expressed by me.” Guerrin then went to her boyfriend to see if he could help her get an answer. Guerrin and her boyfriend, Caedmon Kephart went through all of the love languages and tried to find examples of each. “For acts of service, he knows that I love when he helps me clean my room or get organized and I love to bake things for him or do things to help him out. For words of affirmation, I love to write him little letters and tell him I love him a lot, and I love when he tells me he loves me and what he loves about me.” In the end Guerrin couldn’t decide on just one love language. Guerrin’s boyfriend’s love language is physical touch and knowing this helps Guerrin to love him best. “My boyfriend’s main love language is physical touch, yet he very much appreciates all of the different ways I express my love for him”.
Learning more about your love language can help you to better connect to yourself and others. So take the quiz and build your relationships stronger than ever before.